Some of my best memories lead me back to the...

Bet that made you laugh! But it is true. Sad I guess but true.

I remember sitting there alllll night long, telling stories and lies. Making jokes. Making friends. Seeing old friends, and family members you hadn't seen in years.
I remember the night it turned out to be a "Union Meeting". Remember that Brother?

I remember the night it snowed A LOT while we were sitting there yapping, and we didn't even notice even though we were sitting beside an 8 foot window.

I remember the night someone (who shall remain nameless) danced on the bar just because we told him he wouldn't.

I remember the night that Dustin threw his menu on the ground, told the waitress to stand on it, and told her he'd have what was on the menu.

I remember the night that there were 5 of us and the waiter said he couldn't figure out how we got 7 people to fit in a booth.

I remember the night that a cook and a customer got into a heck of a fight, over how to cook hashbrowns.

I remember the girl with the pop eyes that made us laugh until we couldn't breath. I also remember the girl with toenails that were 2 foot long if they were an inch.

I remember that my cousin Shane has Waffle House Radar. You are probably asking yourself what that is??? I'll tell ya. When we used to take rodeo road trips all over hell and half of Texas,Colorado,Kentucky,Virginia,Illinois and most places in between..Shane would be in the back seat of the truck sound asleep. And all of a sudden he'd sit straight up and say "There's a Waffle House at the next exit, let's stop." And there was one, there always was.I don't know how he knew he never had a clue where we were, wasn't awake enough to see the sign, and heck there weren't any signs anyway. But he got it right everytime!

This wasn't at a Waffle House but it was at the next best thing which is the Burger Barn somewhere in N.C. Hot dog chili splattered all over the front of my shirt,face and arms. And I wasn't even the one Brother was mad at. Oh the times we had back in those days.

Rodeo road trips are a totally different story. Man we laughed alot,fought alot, drank alot (even though we shouldn't have), filled up our gas tanks a lot,yelled Shane's name a lot, lost our voices a lot,drove a lot, played jokes on people a lot. So much fun. Sometimes I miss those days. Then I look at my perfect daughter and know that I'm where I'm supposed to be.

Anyway, enough memories just saw that pic of the Waffle House sign and it dredged up some old memories. I know at least one of you will enjoy them.

Just a little somethin"

Keep It Cowboy

Have you noticed lately how the world is changin'
That our values are adrift upon the sea.
But let me say, one man can make a difference
And I'll put it to ya plain as I can be.

Can I count on you to keep it cowboy
When the bad guys have your back against the wall.
When they try and buy your soul with things that glitter
Can you shed the great temptation after all.

Can you sort a real cowboy from a ringer
Who talks the talk but can't hold up his end.
But instead of pointin' out he ain't worth shootin'
You teach him how and keep him as a friend.

For you are your brother's keeper, it is written
And duty bound, you are to do your part.
Will you stand up for what's right when guns are blazin'
And the weak kneed rookies are losing heart.

See, humans need a solid post to tie to
When the truth and what-they-want-to-hear, gets blurred
When they can't trust all those folks they put in office
They need to know one man who keeps his word.

One whose presence in their life is a reminder
That character still matters on its own.
All I'm askin' you to do is keep it cowboy
So the world around you has a corner stone.

I'm at it again...

Yep that's right poems. About work...I know you hate them. But I don't. So I'm sharing them anyway na na na na boo boo :)

My Friends

I have some very special friends
I'd like to share with you,
I wish that you could meet my friends
And know them as I do.

Their tender hearts are big
As their arms are open wide
To shield us and protect us
From whatever waits outside.

They love all the little children
And would change the world for them
But sometimes their hearts are heavy
Because they just don't know where to begin.

My friends can only do so much
Sometimes they're discouraged too
Nobody gives them the encouragement
And the respect that they are due.

My friends try to right all the wrongs
Wearing their uniforms with pride
But remember they don't make the laws
Sometimes their hands are tied.

Let's get behind my special friends
And back them all the way
Because these special friends of mine
May save your life one day.

If you need my special friends
They're there because their true
And because they care enough
To give thier lives for you.

So when you see these officers
Treat them as a trusted friend
Because you'll never have one as
Loyal as these great men.


All The Hats

They work in a place that most would not dare.
Many types of hats they are asked to wear.
Like doctor,lawyer, a referee for a few
A mechanic,a bouncer, a psychologist too.

From a baby not breathing to a bat in the house,
To counseling those who fight with their spouse.
They're called on to help with a car that won't run
And to find the bad guy..the man with a gun.

All types of diplomas, all types of degrees
are needed by others who do jobs like these.
There are no fancy papers in frames on their wall
But they're always there when you need them and call.

Ready to answer any call that might come.
All types of hats though they wear but just one.
The hat that they wear is not fancy or bold,
It's just simple dark brown with a bright shield of gold.

Did I mention I'm a worrier??

What...Me...Worry?


I'm one of those people who is always worried about something. This is a trait shared by all of the women in my family. We worry. We stress. We stew. If we can't find something tangible to worry about, like kids, or bills, or the leaky roof, we invent something else and worry about that.

What the...what the hell is that? Is that a lump? That feels like a lump. It wasn't there yesterday. Was it? No, I'm sure it wasn't. Maybe it's just a pimple. Or an ingrown hair. Or a cyst. Yes, that's it. A cyst makes perfect sense. But it doesn't hurt. They say cancer doesn't usually hurt. Oh my god I've got cancer. I knew this was going to happen. I should have taken Omega 3 like they said. I should have eaten more food with those...whaddya call 'em...antioxidants. Yes, that's it. Maybe it would help if I took some now. Surely it can't hurt. I'm going to the store right now to get Omega 3 and antioxidants. I need ketchup anyway. I better call the doctor before I leave though. If I call now, I might be able to get in first thing in the morning. The sooner we start chemo, the better. Wait...where did it go? It was here a minute ago, I'm sure of it. Maybe I'm not dying of cancer! I better not get my hopes up though. It could be some kind of strange disappearing cancer. I'm still calling the doctor. I could probably wait and see if it comes back though.

I am a chronic insomniac. I am a night owl by nature.Maybe because I worked straight midnights for a little over 5 years. Thus getting my body used to sleeping during the day. But it is usually because often, I just can't shut off my brain. I lie in bed and examine the issue du jour from every possible angle. I carefully dissect it. I lay the guts of the matter out in front me and then poke and prod them until A) I arrive at a solution, B) My body slips into unconsciousness in self defense.

One might think I would resort to sleep aids. Ambien or Lunesta...one might think I would be popping those things like candy. Maybe shots of Nyquil.. And I'll admit, it's tempting. But alas, I cannot avail myself of these modern day wonderments. Why? Well, because the house might catch on fire, and if I had taken those little magic pills, who the heck would grab Sydney,and all of our important memories and drag them out of the house??

I have never been one of those people who could leave work and not worry about it again until my next shift.I constantly stress over work. I am not a cavalier or carefree kind of Mom. The adage "Everything will work out for the best" is my personal anethema.


You get the point.

Aside from being a tad..ahem...overprotective, I'm also the kind of person who should not read about stuff like global warming, or watch movies about meteors the size of a cruise ship plummeting to the earth.

And yet I do. Because a worry wart's motto is "Forewarned is forearmed".

So...the thing that is freaking me the flock out right now is....

Pthalates.

Recently while browsing the net I ran across this word...


I stumbled across an article about the chemicals that are common in our everyday lives, and how they are slowly destroying our bodies and our brains.

Now, I read all of it. Every word. But it contained far too much scary stuff for me to process without lapsing into a full blown delirium of panic. So, as I normally do when faced with a plethora of really scary stuff....I focused on but one aspect of the article; one which seemed to offer the most significant potential for being really friggen dangerous. In other words, I picked the chemical that seemed the most likely to turn me into a walking biohazard, and devoted myself fully to worrying about it.

Pthalates. Pthalates are a class of chemicals that are used to make plastics pliable. At first, this doesn't really seem like a truly pervasive threat. But if you really start to think about it...Tupperware. Bottled Water. Ziploc bags. Saran Wrap. Laundry Baskets. Lunch boxes. Toothbrush bristles. Automobile dashboards. Coolers. Toy bins. Those cheap plastic tumblers that they sell at Wal-Mart 12 for a dollar and the matching cereal bowls with the straw built into the side.

Dear God. It's everywhere. I could maybe stop using tupperware and drinking bottled water. I could give up plastic cups and bowls. I could, realistically, replace most of the things in my home with those made only of natural materials.

But give up ZIPLOC bags?? The mind boggles.

I think, instead, I will simply stop reading articles on the internet. And Newsweek. Time. USA Today. Reader's Digest. Popular Science. These are not good reading material for me..I should stick to plain old fiction.

Really, really fictional fiction.

I'm starting a twelve step program...Worriers Anonymous. Our motto will be

"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy." ~Leo Buscaglia

or maybe...

"A hundredload of worry will not pay an ounce of debt."
~George Herbert

or perhaps...

"How much pain they have cost us, the evils which have never happened."
~Thomas Jefferson

Do you see what I'm doing here? I'm worrying over what would be the best motto for a fictional program.

I am hardcore baby.

Something Just Occurred To Me

If there's one thing I have done a lot of since becoming a parent, it's eating my words.

I said lots and lots of stuff about parenting before I was actually a parent. My kid will never...." (insert offensive behavior here).

But as we've all learned, once you get down there in the trenches, you do what you have to do to cope. And that's alright.

It took me a long time to be okay with being okay; to allow myself to be less than perfect. And to accept that I was a good mother anyway.

For me, it was because I have to work and be a Mommy. Granted I have help. A lot of help...good help at that.Scotty is awesome! My parents are awesome! My Meme is awesome!! I just feel the need to justify and validate that decision. Some people seem to think that Sydney will be scarred forever because I'm not with her every second of every day. But if I were,when she started to school,it would be like losing a limb. (Heck it'll probably be that way anyway.)


But I have learned a few things, stumbled, found my feet and my groove, and ate a lot of crow regarding the judgements I'd made before I had a child.

I sometimes let her have a cookie even though she didn't finish her dinner. I don't always follow through on my threats. I sometimes give in to avoid a whining session. The list goes on.

Because parenting is hard work and parents get tired. Damn tired. So unless they are doing something really, really harmful to themselves or others, it's okay to let them get away with stuff once in a while.

Still, I do it. I judge. I find myself looking at teenagers and thinking to myself..."Boy, if I ever caught my kid behaving that way...."

I should know better.

Because it just occurred to me that Sydney will not be a little girl forever. In a shorter amount of time that I think she will be a teenager.
I'm sure that parenting a teen is, in essence, starting all over.

We'll have a whole new set of hurdles to jump, and a stranger that has sprung forth from the child we once knew. We are coping with issues that have long term consequences on the lives and future of my daughter.

Because honestly? The age at which a child is potty trained or learns their ABC's is wholly insignificant when you consider the perils they face in adolescence.

Drugs. Alchohol. Driving ((shudder)). Sex and Relationships. Identity struggles. Being a leader and not a follower when following is so much easier. Autonomy. Who and what to be when she grows up, and how to achieve that.

And here's the thing...when we see her poised to misstep, we can't put out a hand to steady her or set her on the right path. We can only watch her muddle through and hope her mistakes are not too grievous.

You can pick a toddler up, brush her off, and kiss away the hurt. You can hold her hand when she crosses the street. You can hold the back of the seat when she learns to ride a bike.

But you can't take her SAT's. You can't say no when she is offered a joint or a beer. You can't put on the brakes for her when she's in the throes of teenage passion. You can't tell her not to run that stop sign, even though there's no cop in sight.

Independance has got to be the name of the game when parenting a teen. It's more about facilitating autonomy than imposing our own will. The focus shifts from actively teaching, to simply letting them learn.

And that is going to be harder than anything I can possibly imagine.

Especially knowing that if I fail, my daughter will go out into the world with no idea how to navigate it.

And on top of AAAAALLLLL that...you have to learn not to take it personally when she'd rather be with her friends than you. When she asks you to drop her off at the corner. When she rolls her eyes and sighs at the things I say and do. When I am no longer her hero.

I'm lucky. I still have quite a few years, until this hits our family. But I also know that it will be here a lot sooner than I'd like it to be.
And I have no idea why this popped into my head. Other than the fact that I'm sick,and working midnights. And all sorts of odd things come to mind when your up all night,while the rest of the world slumbers.
Just do me a favor???

Cherish your little ones. Don't sweat the Crayola on the walls. Kiss as many boo-boos as you can. Read stories. Play games.

But be ready for the day when they push you away. It means you did it right.

I do not know

Who wrote this poem, but it holds a lot of meaning.


My Cup Has Overflowed
I've never made a fortune
and I'll never make one now
But it doesn't really matter
'cause I'm happy anyhow.

As I go along my journey
I'm reaping better than I've sowed
I'm drinking from the saucer
'cause my cup has overflowed.

I don't have alot of riches
and sometimes the goings tough
But with kin and friends to love me
I think I'm rich enough.

I thank God for the blessings
that His mercy has bestowed
I'm drinking from the saucer
' cause my cup has overflowed.

He gives me strength and courage
When the way grows steep and rough
I'll not ask for other blessings
for I'm already blessed enough.

May we never be too busy
to help another bear a load
Then we'll all be drinking
from the saucer
when our cups they overflow.

It is COLD!!

Nothing much going on around here except for the fact that it is cold,cold,cold. A crisp 7 degrees in fact. That is pretty much the warmest it has been here for awhile.
And Sydney has a cold,cold,cold. And I'm getting one myself.

I thought I'd share some of my photo shop creations since there is no news to report.

Silent Sunday

Your Probably getting

Tired of the Law Enforcement related posts...but that is a large part of who I am. I wrote this for Jamie..the deputy that was shot a few weeks ago. Some people are saying it's no big deal,that it's part of his job. And they are right it IS part of his job, but I don't think people realize what these guys go through. I know that some will disagree and that's fine,because until you are actually involved in Law Enforcement you will NEVER understand what it's like.....never.

Anyway..I'll get off of my soapbox!! (also if you ever get bored please check out our website at www.sheriffsoffice.org)

What A Deputy Takes

First he takes...the oath.

Now let's look at what else he takes.
He takes--it in stride when people call him pig.
He takes--his lousy paycheck & realizes he'll never be rich.
He takes--time to stop and talk to children.
He takes--your verbal abuse while giving you a ticket you deserved.
He takes--on creeps that you'd be afraid to even look at twice.
He takes--time away from his family to keep YOUR family safe.
He takes--the graveyard shift without complaint because it's his turn.
He takes--his life into his own hands each and every day.
He takes--you home if your car breaks down.
He takes--time to explain to you why BOTH of your headlights need to work.
He takes--the job nobody else wants..telling you a loved one has died.
He takes--criminals to jail.
He takes--in sights that would make you cry.
and sometimes he cries too, but he takes it anyway
because somebody has to.
He takes--memories to bed each night that you couldn't bear for even a day.

Sometimes he takes--a bullet.
And yes occasionally......he might just take a free cup of coffee.
If he is lucky...the takes retirement.
Then one day he pays for all he takes.......and hopefully....God takes him.

Happy New Year!

Hope everyone has a happy & healthy 2009!!
I really don't have a whole lot to write about yet...so I'll just post some Christmas pictures,now that I have a few minutes to actually sit here and post them!

**Santa remembered to stop and see Sydney!**



**Christmas at Meme and Papa's house**


**Christmas at Nana & PePaw's house**




**And finally Christmas at our own house**







**And the big hit!! All she kept saying was "WOW,WOW,WOW!!"**







**She almost,almost fell asleep under the tree!**



**Barring this one incident she has had NOTHING to do with the Barbie doll..that's my girl!**







**Future basketball star..to go along with the Rockstar in the previous picture! And even though she got a horse...Daddy gives the best rides of all!**




A BIG thank you to Auntie Marcia and Uncle Dave for the Thomas sweatshirt. Haven't been able to get any pics of her wearing it yet but I will. And the snowman kit is the cutest thing ever!! Now we are just waiting on the snow to put it to use.